EXT. SANDWICH STORE PARKING LOT - DAY

               An insanely annoying car alarm screeches. It's the typical
               car alarm that cycles through a myriad of annoying
               cacophonies. Elliot holds the alarm to his chin trying to
               turn off the alarm.

                                   KIRK
                             (yelling)
                         Ahhh. Turn that shit off!!

                                   DYLAN
                         Dude, turn it off.

                                   ELLIOT
                         I'm trying. 

                                   SFX
                         Beep beep bwoop.

               We pull back to reveal our five friends standing around a
               small compact car. It's Elliot's car. 

                                   DEX
                         If I ever have a kid, that's what
                         I'm going to name him.

                                   GRANT
                         What?

                                   DEX
                         The sound the alarm makes. You
                         know... Booowhip Booowhip
                         Booowhip.. Ahhhnaa Ahhhnnnaa...
                         Ahhhnnnnaaaa... Woooooooop.. get in
                         here and finish your dinner.

                                   KIRK
                         Can you imagine his first day of
                         school. They'd be taking roll and
                         the poor teacher would be trying to
                         sound out his name.

                                   GRANT
                         Just imagine his license.

               The friends start walking from the car to the comic store.

                                   DYLAN
                         Better yet. They should make a car
                         alarm that sounds like the Muppets.

                                   DEX
                         Muppet car alarm?

                                   DYLAN
                         Yeah, like Fozzi. Wakka Wakka Wakka
                         Wakka Wakka.

                                   KIRK
                         Kermit would be all Heigh Ho Heigh
                         Ho Heigh Ho Heigh Ho.

                                   GRANT
                         That's a good idea. How about Miss
                         Piggy. What would she sound like?

                                   ELLIOT
                         Kermie, Kermie, Kermie, Kermie..

                                   FRIENDS
                             (laughing)

                                   KIRK
                         Ah... that's a good one.

                                   KIRK
                         Hey numb nuts. Do you think we
                         could have parked any further away
                         from the fucking sandwich shop?
                         This isn't Wally World.

                                   DEX
                         Just remember we parked in water
                         buffalo.

               EXT. SANDWICH SHOP - DAY

               The friends are walking out of the sandwich shop, meals in
               hand. They're trying to find a table to sit at.

                                   DYLAN
                         Did you see that girl in there? She
                         was totally checking me out.

                                   GRANT
                         Dylan, she's a checker. That's what
                         they do. They check people out.

                                   KIRK
                             (impersonating Arnold)
                         That's a Good one.

                                   DYLAN
                         I think it's the glasses. You know
                         what I'm talking about.

                                   KIRK
                         It's not the glasses. It's your
                         overactive imagination.

                                   DYLAN
                         Shut up.

               The friends begin to eat.

                                   DEX
                         Talk about hot chicks. I gotta find
                         out who that girl in the cowboy hat
                         was.

                                   KIRK
                         You should've porked her brains
                         out.

                                   GRANT
                         Don't listen to him.

                                   DEX
                         I don't even have her name. She was
                         so perfect. I mean...

                                   GRANT
                         That's what you said about Trinna.

                                   DEX
                         Don't mention her.. Anytime someone
                         mentions her, Brick shows up. I had
                         to hide behind a cardboard beer
                         girl this morning at the Qwiki
                         mart. He nearly cornered me.

                                   GRANT
                         So why didn't you ask this girl
                         out. You're treating her like 17
                         inch Mango Fett.

                                   ELLIOT
                         Mango Fett is regular size. Limited
                         edition. Only three produced. Two
                         of which have already been found.

                                   DYLAN AND KIRK
                         Yeah.

                                   GRANT
                         Relax Star Dorks. I was joking. You
                         guys are really falling for the
                         Mango and the Chocolate factory
                         scheme, aren't you.

                                   DEX
                         It's for real.. whoever finds the
                         Mango Fett's get to be extras in
                         the next movie.

                                   DYLAN
                         I'm not a star dork.

                                   GRANT
                         Hah. That's laughable. This from
                         the man who has every Star Trek on
                         tape.

                                   DYLAN
                         I'm totally over that. I'm into CNN
                         babes now.

                                   KIRK
                         What? You can't be serious.

                                   DEX
                         No, I know what he's talking about.
                         Willow Bay, Linda Stouffer..

                                   DYLAN
                         Oooohhh, Kate Snow.

                                   ELLIOT, DEX, DYLAN AND GRANT
                         Christiana Amanpour!

               The friends continue to eat and slurp sodas.